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| YM (Feb. 2000 issue) The Perils of Popularity Ever look around the caf and wonder why some people get all access passes to the cool crowd while others can't even scoot pass security? Even if you've never had popularity pangs, just checking out an episode of "Popular" is enough to make you want to opt for home schooling. The show's star's Carly Pope and Leslie Bibb are convinced that seemingly opposite personalities have more in common than anyone suspects. "On the show, sure you see the surface stereotypes that exist at every school", says Carly. But you also see what's going on inside the characters homes, and you see that everyone is fighting insecurity." In real life, the actresses have moved on from high school woes to cool careers. After growing up in Vancouver, B.C., Carly racked up acting experience with small parts in flicks like Disturbing Behavior, then enrolled in college before scoring her big gig as Sam. Now living in L.A., she says, "I feel like the new kid in school, trying to figure out where I fit in".  Myth
#1..Popularity equals a problem free life"I saw people at school who seemed to have easier lives," adds Carly. But when I actually sat down to talk to them, I realized we were in the same boat, just trying to determine our place in the social structure". Myth #2..Cliques are always bad news. Cliques become harmful only when you feel like you must act or dress in a certain way to be accepted. Carly dubs her gal group her comfort zone. Myth #3..Eventually, you'll find the look or attitude that will make you queen of the scene. Carly cautions against putting too much of a premium on appearance. "When I was 11, I was friends with some girls who suddenly became more popular than I was, and we drifted apart, she recalls. Then one day, one of them came up to me and said, "Oh, I see you've started shaving your legs! We should hang out sometime. Of course, I went home and hugged my mother for letting me shave. But you know what? The feeling that I'd achieved something special sure didn't last long" Yet the friendship did last. The two began hanging out again, and she realized that fuzz free legs or smooth beauty moves weren't the keys to being fab. "She was just using the shaving thing as an excuse to reconnect with me". Myth #4..The friends you have now are the only friends for you. Carly says the divisions between the groups at her high school dissolved during senior year "The class realized that we'd been shutting each other out for too long, she says. It taught me that you can form the deepest friendship with someone you might have disregarded because you thought you had to stay in your tiny group" Myth #5.. Surrounding yourself with friends 24/7 is the only way to feel good about yourself. Carly took comfort in chilling at home. "I got to a point at school where I just didn't feel like traveling in a herd, and I didn't want to be going to parties constantly, she says. I wanted to spend time bonding with my little brother. I didn't need to do things just for the sake of being accepted by a certain crowd"  Myth #6..There's only one kind of cool. No way -- cool comes in styles. Still as Carly notes, It isn't always easy to be yourself in a crowd. "Its a frightening thing to act on your opinions, You've got to find confidence in yourself, not in what others think of you. Im still trying to separate how I see myself from how I'm perceived, It's not easy, but it's worth it" (message from sandi) I have omitted certain sections of this article. To view the whole article please contact YM magazine. |
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